Friday, March 11, 2011

Thoughts on a Video Game Tech Demo:

I watched this demo reel for some new graphics technology from Epic Games (the studio behind Unreal and Gears of War) featuring their upcoming game "Samaritan". The graphics were fine. Everything else was not fine.

Apparently the Future Video Games is the Past of Video Games

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INTRO

Camera pans from 'Epic' logo to reveal a street that could literally have been lifted, element for element, from Blade Runner.

Camera shifts again to show an 'Unreal' logo, with admittedly impressive lighting.

Cut to a blowtorch, cutting through a chain that locks...something. Pan back to reveal Bad-Ass Dude in a leather jacket wielding it.

Bad-Ass Dude needs to re-light his cigarette, and USES THE BLOWTORCH. HELL YEAH.

Closeup of Bad-Ass Dude's bad-ass face. Unshaven, with cuts and scars. ("Look at his face" Real-life announcer implores)

B.A.D. hears a siren, and walks over to the ledge of the building he is cutting chains on. Fortunately this door that had to be unlocked with a blowtorch for some reason was on a roof to provide for maximum cool angles.

Camera raises over B.A.D.'s shoulder to show fascist future-cops beating on a helpless citizen in the city streets below.

While looking disgusted in a non-emotional-bad-ass way, B.A.D.'s face CHANGES TO REVEAL HE IS ACTUALLY A ROBOT/ALIEN/MUTANT. Apparently this uses 'tessellation technology'. I'm pretty sure this is a new coding technique that allows up to four times as many cliches into a single frame of computer animation.

B.A.D. Takes one last drag of his cigarette, and THROW IT AT THE FASCIST COPS WITH HIS COOL ROBOT/ALIEN/MUTANT hand. Cigarette strikes fascist cop who exclaims "HEY, WHAT THE F-" in a deep robo-fascist voice that could easily have been a soundboard from Half-Life 2 (Or yaknow... any game).

B.A.D. LEAPS FROM BUILDING and PULVERIZES Fascist Cop #1 into the ground! Slo-Mo For cool action pose, and then AWESOME PUNCH that sends Fascist Cop #2 reeling into a conveniently placed billboard. Upon impact, this billboard ELECTROCUTES Fascist Cop #2 in case we forgot he just got punched into a pane of glass.

Fascist Cop #3 is then REPEATEDLY PUNCHED, including a punch that directly mimics the angle, slowed-time, and even blood-spit from Fight Night. He falls to the ground, defeated.

Camera shifts to ground level so we can see B.A.D. CURB-STOMP HIM. Fascist Cop #4 feebly shoots at his ever-shifting ROBOT/ALIEN/MUTANT face.

B.A.D. draws out a DIRTY HARRY STYLE MAGNUM, and using the laser sight, SCORES A DIRECT HEAD-SHOT BETWEEN THE EYES. BOOM. Camera pans behind Fascist Cop #4 so we can see the back of his head explode.

Camera switches to high-angle shot as B.A.D. stands alone amidst the carnage. Surely smoking will re-commence. Frame left reveals the nearest building to have a medical cross, and a sign that reads 'Arms, Legs, Torsos (?)'. Obvious ironic device, or obvious attempt at dystopian set-building?

...YOU DECIDE.


Then our hero smokes (surprise!) and a robot sneaks up on him, complete with the scene where we see the robot, and he doesn't. Then the robot says something lame about 'unacceptable', and B.A.D. throws his stupid cigarette AGAIN, and then B.A.D. lunges to punch this giant robot that is 20x his size.

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I was completely struck by two things:


1) This is one of the premier game developers in the world. They have all the money they need to make something amazing and original that would stick in the viewer's mind, and they piece together a three minute demo reel that completely fails to feature a single original or interesting idea.

2) This is apparently the future of video games. That same square-jawed anti-hero robot that you've been strafing with for the last 15 years is exactly who you'll be playing for the next few. In the eyes of one of the most influential and wealthy game developers in the world, technology has advanced incredibly, and everything else has gone absolutely nowhere.

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